Spring Equinox in Colorado.

This past Saturday was the Spring Equinox. Eostre is a Pagan goddess of Spring, and despite her youthful nature it takes her a bit longer to reach our high mountain region of Colorado.

As the sun rose in the East (the direction named after Eostre) on Saturday, it was overshadowed once again by the tenacious bite of Old Man Winter.

The mountains are the last refuge for him as slowly but surely Eostre's warm, sunny smiles force him to retreat higher and higher until his influence is only seen on the tops of the tallest peaks. Yet even there his size and power is much subdued.

So, Saturday when it snowed we took heart in knowing it was the last gasps of a dying tyrant because then Sunday it warmed up nicely as Eostre charged forward. We must endure one last battle it appears tomorrow and on Wednesday but after that I think Eostre will finally reign supreme.

Speaking of Eostre, the name of the "Christian" holiday of Easter comes from her name!! Do the Christians have any holidays that they haven't stolen and from the Pagan peoples?

PHOTO CREDIT: Doscaras

Fall of the Giants.

The year that I was born my parents planted two cottonwood trees in our backyard. They grew as I grew and they played a major roles in all our lives. I was a quiet kid who didn't have many friends because I was a sensitive boy and loved books. So, I grew to prefer playing alone. I would often put a book or two into a canvas bag with draw-strings to cinch it up and hang it around my shoulders before climbing high into one of the giant cottonwoods to read. There was a perfect spot where big and densely packed branches made a natural recliner to read in. I would spend hours upon hours reading high in my natural wizards tower reading about dragons, knights and magic users.

After reading a bit, I would often gaze up and out into the cobalt, summer, blue skies to be entranced with the white puffy clouds as they morphed into new shapes every few seconds while passing by. Also from my perch I could spy upon other kids playing in the park across the street and see everything that went on around our end of the neighborhood. Sometimes I'd just sit back and enjoy the breeze that would often blow through, making the tree gently sway. I had such a secure spot I even took little napes up there!! Some of my fondest memories are from reading up in those trees as well as hanging off their branches to swing around like a monkey.

Well, I'm 34 now and those trees are rotting from the inside out. They're sick and it pained my heart deeply to hear my parents say that the city told them to cut them down because they were becoming a danger to nearby houses. I dreaded the day and my parents did too. Well, that day came yesterday when I got a tearful call from my mother who needed sympathy as the tree cutters were tearing into the flesh of our trees with their weapons of destruction -- chainsaws. My mother hardly ever breaks down emotionally and so being a bit of a "Momma's boy" I crashed out the front door with my camera in hand to make the 15 minute drive to their house. When I arrived I saw trucks lining the sidewalk in front of their house with branches scattered about the front yard like bones about to be ground up in the wood chipper situated on our front lawn.

It sounded like a monster as it ate up the bones of our trees, roaring like a ravenous, half-crazed beast. Chain saws echoed like a swarm of angry wasps descending upon my childhood home and beloved trees. I bounded into the house and found my mother in a heap on the couch, sobbing like a child. She has always have a very sensitive heart, which I inherited. She taught me to respect all living things, which obviously included trees and plant life. My father did the same and being a bird enthusiast he taught me about all the different birds that would flock to the safety of the trees and the food we left out hanging from their massive limbs. My Dad mourned the birds that would no longer come to visit -- at least not in the numbers they use to. My Mom and I saw the tree trimmer workers as violators to our yard who were murdering our great trees while we stood by helpless. We knew they had to come down but it was like losing two family members. I can't tell you how many picnics we enjoyed in the shade of the big arms those trees provided.

As the chainsaws chewed up our green friends there were great clouds of falling saw dust, which I interpreted as being tears from the trees. As the big chunks of branches fell from the sky they hit the Earth with a bone shattering thud that shook the house and our hearts. It was heart wrenching to watch our friends be methodically dismembered. We cried and held each other as the workers bragged at how quickly they were taking the trees down. I thought how cruel it is that these trees would fall in a matter of two days when it took them 30 years to grow to their towering heights. It didn't seem right yet I was reminded of how impermanent life is on this planet and we reminded each other that this tree will live on in wood pulp that will enable other greenery and trees to grow.

Finally, I couldn't take all the noise and crashing of tree parts so I dragged my parents out of the house to get a break from the commotion and the scene of the crime. We went to lunch and that defininately helped us regroup and find some solace and insight into remembering that this was all the circle of life. We thought, perhaps the trees were tired and being sick that they wanted to be released from their rotting bodies. It helps us let them go. My Mom even gave them hugs the night before their demise and I patted their trunks softly. One day they will plant new trees but it will never be the same and they will never again grow another cottonwood in honor of our two fallen sentinels. Rest in peace friends.

Avatar Promotes Environmentalism. Deal with It.

Believe the hype. "Avatar" has blown the lid off the traditional movie format and set the standard for movie making in this new century. I've seen it now twice and I like it now even more than I did the first time. The visuals are the big attraction and they are spectacular but the story is sometimes lost in the shuffle because of it. There is nothing wrong with the story line at all -- In fact, it presents a good and timely message about how the actions of humans are destroying not just Mother Earth but our own species. It's just that the visuals are so mind-blowing and revolutionary that people seem to talk more about them then the critically important message of environmental restoration and protection.

The alien people in the movie are pretty cool (imagine smurfs on steroids) and they live in total harmony with their natural world. It's beauty is breath-taking and is a place I would love to visit and experience for real but the 3D effects get you there as close as possible. It's a long movie but the time goes by fast and it's easy to get pulled into their world and let the story and images take you away. There are these floating mountains in particular in their world that are just stunning and look like great places for a hermit shaman like myself to live in. I hope that people do hear that message of helping nature and not just exploiting her. It is why that despite some violence that I'd let older kids watch it to teach them the importance of environmentalism.

I'm a tree guy -- a full-blown tree-hugger. So imagine my connection to this story when I realized that have especial reverence for trees!! It's simply a movie that you have to see but a big part of the movie are the 3D images. You'll miss out on the full experience if you don't catch the 3D version of the film. Do whatever you have to do to get a babysitter if you have kids because this one is a MUST. SEE. And I'm rather picky about my movies. Some people don't want to hear the message of being at one with the environment and protecting her by living in a sustainable way. Case in point, I over-heard this lady talking to her husband on the way out of the theater. She said, with annoyance in her voice, "They don't make humans look very good." I thought to myself, "Lady, humans are probably the most destructive species that this planet has ever known." Some people just don't get or want to get it. They think Jesus will come and save everything so why bother protecting anything. It makes me want to slam my head into a wall over and over with frustration.

Also, some people are pissed off that the movie promotes environmentalism and a pagan, earth based belief system. Deal with it people or don't watch the fucking movie!! No one is holding a gun to your head to go watch the evil, blue pagan people (rolls eyes). The level of me-ism in this country is unbelievable. I can't believe that some people are so arrogant and narcissistic that they think they can tell a private business (movie companies) to bend to their beliefs about what should be in movies and what shouldn't!! It's astounding to me and if their narcissism is to that degree then I am not surprised that they don't care if humans rape the Earth and push other cultures out of the way for the sake of "progress."

Anyway, go see the movie already!! I don't think you'll be disappointed. Especially if you're a tree-hugger like me!!

Happy Winter Solstice!!

This is the shortest day and longest night of the year, which is the last blast of darkness before the sun rises slowly but surely to offer longer and longer days and increased sunlight. So it is a day of rebirth and I welcome the rebirth of the Sun with open warms. May it warm our lands and hearts to carry us healthily into Spring. This Winter Solstice I dedicate the next year to fighting harder for protecting the environment. I will also be lighting a candle to burn all day in honor of the Sun and its rejuvenating powers. As this holiday is all about welcoming the Sun I wanted to leave you with something fun about such beliefs. So, I give you George Carlin's comedy routine on worshiping the Sun. WARNING: ADULT LANGUAGE IN VIDEO:

---HAPPY WINTER SOLSTICE!!!---

Independent Pagan.

I have noticed a trend in American religious thought that many are leaving the cold, rigid religious boundaries of the past as we emerge from the cocoon of a puritanical society. The trend seems to be one of reclaiming one's independence and freedom to tailor one's philosophy/religion/belief system to what feels right for them. It is in that light from which I write out this declaration of what Paganism means to me. It's long but I hope you find it interesting.

It is but one branch, however, to my overall tree of beliefs, which also include Buddhism, Taoism, Hindu Mysticism, a bit of the Occult and Secular Humanism. I am writing this out mostly for my benefit as I explore what I believe as far as my Pagan side expresses. If anyone finds it useful or interesting then I'm happy to have aided you in some way:

I am of Scottish and Norwegian descent. My last name is an old Scottish one, which is also the name of a small fishing village not far off the northern, Scottish, Shetland islands on the far eastern coast of Norway. As my parents are Mormon they are very into family genealogy and figure that my Scottish ancestors were originally Norse Vikings who migrated to northern Scotland. Thus the fiery orange red beard I wear. I say all of this to say that the foundation of my Pagan philosophy is a mix of ancient Celtic, Gaelic and Norse pagan practices/beliefs. I'm also very atheistic so I am not one of those Pagans who believe in spells, praying to gods or worshiping other mythical beings. I enjoy them as aspects within myself represented in a very easy to understand and absorb fashion in visual images. That is why I connect so well to altars and images of gods as visual information is my best way of processing things. They are symbols to me of what I seek to embody, strive for and avoid.

I collect objects important to me, which I place upon my altar not because I believe they have any magical power but because they mean something meaningful to me. So to see all these personally sacred objects collected and positioned altogether, with care, is inspirational and visually very pleasing and thus calming to me. My therapist speaks of balancing my scales as I am a very pessimistic and cynical being. It's a weakness of mine I struggle with daily. So basically my scales are totally lopsided with negative stuff weighing the scale down to one side. One reason for my constant low level of depression and feelings of hopelessness come from not having enough positive things that bring my scale into more balance. So since I have realized that seeing all these images, (such as the ones on this blog, in my house and on my altar) bring me happiness, empowerment and peace I am embracing it.

Animism is another important facet to my independent Pagan philosophy as I spent two life changing years in Cote D'Ivoire, West Africa where I came into contact with the belief system. It is one that believes all things have a "life force" or "energy" within it that connects all things together in an interdependent web of existence. Rocks, plants, waterfalls, rivers, mountains, springs, trees, dirt, rain, etc. This blends nicely into my Buddhist, Taoist and general pagan beliefs. Traditional Animism believes these things such as objects or wooden statues represent spirits, which if given the right things will bless or curse you or others. However, again being atheistic I use my objects and locations as symbols of people and places that I cherish deeply.

These memories are more easily and more powerfully activated for me by visual representations, which I place on my Animist altar. The objects also represent my hopes and aspirations, which when contemplated upon bring about a feeling of peace and contentment. Some things I place upon either of my three altars without really knowing why -- just that they catch my attention and fascinate me. My altars are like moving art -- they are alive and a moving, ever evolving sacred space. I change things around based on the seasons, my mood, my intentions or just for a change. I often don't ask why I should put something where I place it but rather follow my intuition that it is meant to be there. If it's pleasing to the eye that is often enough for me to find it meaningful. Sometimes we ask too many questions and seek too much for reasons for doing things. This life is often about letting go and just following the flow of energy and see where it takes us.

The final aspect of my Pagan philosophy right now is that of Shamanism, which involves a Shaman acting as intermediary between the spirit world and the human realm. I don't believe in spirits much but I do believe that all things have an energy that could involve electromagnetic waves, which pulse throughout all objects and beings. Those waves would seem to affect and connect with the electrical behavior of our brain. It isn't the same as traditional electricity but in both cases they involved pules of energy radiating through a network of circuits. Plus, Earth has it's own magnetic field that is pulsing throughout everything that resides upon it. This would all explain why some places and people have a stronger pull to them than others such as the north and south poles, etc. However, I am severely digressing from discussing my interpretation and practice of Shamanism.

One of the other important aspects to Shamanism is connecting with, watching, learning from being guided by the animal kingdom. Animals have always been attracted to me, especially cats. Where ever we move there are always cats that seek us out. We have saved so many strays over the years. At this one place we lived there was this cat that would come and hang out with me on our porch. He would sit on the post of the railing and I would sit on the stairs and we'd just sit and absorbs the sights, sound and smells of nature together. I am very cat like with excellent reflexes, acute senses, strong spirit of independence and a creature of the night. So cat like animals are especially totem guides to me as well as hawks/eagles/owls but I find inspiration in all critters. I see them in part as omens. For example, I was about to head off to a weekend in Las Vegas (we all know what THAT means) but while we were waiting on the airplane they told us the previous flight that this plane had just landed from was being cleaned because it sucked a red-tail hawk into the engine!! I was horrorfied as the red-tail in particular is a favorite animal totem of mine as we both have red spots (it feathers and me my beard). So, well, the rest of that weekend in Vegas turned out of be one of the worst three days of my life. I should have known.

The other part of Shamanism that I have adopted is the role of healer. Since I was a young adult I've always taken an interest in plants and use to chew on mint leaves from my neighbors garden. Then one of my first and longest jobs was working at a vitamin and herb company selling it too people who would call in to place orders. I got to know what vitamins and herbs did what for a person's health. I have committed many of the herb books to heart and am that guy who is always suggesting herbs and natural remedies for common illnesses like colds, stomach ailments and the like. This includes psychoactive substances such as cannabis and magic mushrooms to explore the depths of consciousness. Well, I think that's enough for now.

~Be well~

I'm Reclaiming the Pagan Wreath from Christians.

One thing I do to help remind me that life will return despite the freezing depths of winter is by bringing a wreath into the house. It is a nice splash of green life amidst all the lifeless snow and the scent of pine is so relaxing and invigorating. I choose wreaths in part because Christmas trees have become synonymous with Christianity. And while wreaths are still used by Christians they seem less polluted by Christian tradition. I want to reclaim the wreath for Pagans. I know that part of these Christian Christmas traditions were stolen from the Pagans to assimilate Pagans into Christianity but that makes me wonder even more about the supposed "peaceful message" of Christianity. They sure don't like it when someone mocks their traditions but it's o.k. to maintain the Christian mockery of Pagan, yule-tide celebrations by stealing our symbols and supplanting the Pagan meanings behind them with Christian ones?

No, I'm done with sharing. So I'm reclaiming the wreath, the "Christmas tree" and all the other Pagan traditions that Christians enjoy but probably have no idea of their origin. Imagine the outrage they'd feel if we took the cross and said it was now a symbol of Pagan resistance to Christianity as carried out by the Romans. They'd be furious and rightly so but they don't give a shit about stealing someone else's traditions. You'd think they'd want to purge those elements from their supposed, "pure" religion like some have tried to do recently with Halloween celebrations, which stem from the fall, Pagan celebration of Samhain. What these Christians don't realize is that they'd not have much left to celebrate the season except the cross and the manger. They love to have it both ways -- They don't want anyone to call this holiday season anything but Christmas but they'll keep using Pagan oriented traditions? Then again, since when did many (not all but many) Christians worry about double standards?

Plus the circle represents the cycle of life, death and rebirth -- rebirth being a the key to emotional survival in the winter months. The empty hole in the center of a wreath reminds me of all that is yet to be known such as the great mysteries of our existence. It is also a symbol of our homes (the center space in the wreath) being surrounded and protected from the elements by nature such as big pine trees that withstand and blowing winter winds. I have considered ordering a wreath made specifically for Pagans but we'll probably just get one at the grocery store because of a tight budget. We, like a lot of people don't have a lot of money to spend this time of year.

~Be well~

Cave Temples.

Since the dawn of man we have been fascinated, mesmerized and drawn to caves. Initially they were used for shelter and that feeling of refuge surely was partly why ancient Pagans saw them connected with the feminine. They were wombs of protection and these ancestors quite literally believed them to be the womb of Mother Earth herself. The sacredness was surely reinforced by their other worldly in appearances. They were the first "buildings" man inhabited and were surely, in part, the inspiration for future sacred spaces such as delicately decorated cathedrals, temples and mosques.Take a look at the small spires of a cathedral such as the ornate ones in the foreground of the picture above. Their design often is quite similar to the stalactites and stalagmites of caves and caverns. "It can be pointed out that the cella or naos of a classical temple was not provided with windows, so that the interior space was dark and cave-like (cf. the Athenian Acropolis). One set of doors provided the only access and the only source of natural light. The doors would have been opened on religious occasions, and perhaps at times when the location and angle of the sun (and because the temple was so oriented in the first place) permitted sunlight to penetrate directly into the otherwise dark interior space (such as occurs at Abu Simbel and Newgrange)."

Green Man: Being that my body runs hot I really like the coolness of caves and the damp, musty smell helps remind me that I'm in a place like nowhere else above ground. As I penetrate these caves it feels as if I literally am transported to another world. It's as though these caves are portals to exploring places not just inside the Earth but inside our spirit, mind and body. Other than that I can't really explain my affinity and pull toward caves. The first time I entered a cave as a kid I felt instantly at home in them, however, I must say that I don't like squeezing through tight spaces like those found in some caves.

In the Buddhist tradition caves have been the refuges of monks who seek out their isolation and quiet to meditate and practice enlightenment. That appeals me to immensely being that Buddhism is my main belief system. The life of a hermit cave dweller sounds wonderful given how crazy the world has become. In nature our ancestors found refuge in the woods, caves and mountains -- It is time that we rediscover that past and seek their safety and wisdom yet again.

-Be Well-